I AM ON A FUCKING MODE I DIDN'T WANT TO BE................. Y AM I THINKING LIKE THIS, ARGGGGGGGGGHH

Okay this post is bou something on my mind and i just wanna fucking pour my mind out to someone and my blogsville peeps were the only ones i could think of, so here is wat happened.....

I planned on leaving for my house today and i hoped to spend a fucking alone time with MR B. Last night, normally from work he comes back home, take his dinner and then go see some friends and would be back by night fall.

In worst cases, on thursday or friday nights, he could go to the club with his boys and return at least 2am. Me being the good girl dat i am,i let him have his time with the boys as far he comes back home to me.

Last night as usual, he hung out with the boys, i was watching a movie when i looked at the time, twas 1.30am(i have insomnia, i dont sleep at night, i sleep during the day), continued with my movie, then 2am passed still no sign of MR B, 4am, no sign of him.i picked up my phone and called him, he has three lines, 2 of them were not reacheable, the 3rd one was ringing, no answer.

I started to panick,(stupid me,because of say i love man wey neva marry me oo, mscheew). 6am, no sign of him yet, i went downstairs thinking maybe he was in the office(there is a office in the house), no sign of him, checked all the other rooms, he wasnt there.i went back upstairs, and i called the gate house to confirm he wasnt home, gateman said "OGA NEVER COME".

Less than an hour later, he walks in, and i got to quote the convo word for word:

MR B: hey
ME: (i didnt answer, by then MADAME was ready to come out but i had to keep my cool)

He removes his cloth(the one he wore to work a day b4 oo) and climbs into the bed, then he started tounching me, see 4 my mind i said is this man joking with me....

ME: dont touch me
MRB : WHY? wats wrong
ME: u come home almost 7am and u dont sleep at home knowing fully well am leaving 2mrw and u leave me alone at home, where were u?
MR B: am sorry, i was at my friend's house when i checked d time and it was 12am, my friend told me to stay over dat twas too late to be going back home at this time, (he comes back home at 2am oo and he is now scared ofdriving home at 12am)
ME: and y didnt u pick my call when i was calling u
MR B: i left my phones in the office (I DIDNT BELIVE DAT CRAP BUT I DIDNT SAY SO)
ME: y didnt u call at least to say u were sleeping over at a friend's house
MR B: am sorry, it wont happen again, am sorry.

I said okay o, he slept for an hour or two and dressed up for work dat is after i changed my flight till 2mrw so i can spend time with him b4 i leave.But wats wrong now is dat okay i know u should trust ur man, but i just dont belive his story, and i want to let sleeping dogs lie but i just dont belive his story. do you think its weird?

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Am freaking bored out of my head, this weekend was bad and boring.

I cried, i got pissed at MR B.,he said something that hurt me so much but i don't blame him, mscheew.

But i had a swell time chating with someone, a blogger too, and it was fun, dat cheered me a little bit though. thanks blogger.

Due to lack of anything to do,i photoshoped my picture.........hehe, u can't see my face.sha sha,see it oh.WEN U SEE ME ON THE ROAD OR WEREVER U WONT KNOW AM THE ONE, this is fun. ITS UP DERE.

"MADAME" IN ACTION (ITS NOT TODAY SHE HAS BEEN SHOWING HERSELF............

Am sorry guys, but the 2nd part of the last post has to wait,i dont want to drop half baked gist,i want to give you the full gist.I was fixing MR B's room when i came across my sketch book,i was still admiring my sketches when i turned to the back of my sketch book and i saw that i wrote something on it, and guess who wrote it, wasn't me ooo, t'was MADAME.This is it oooo word for word, the one's highlighted are my thoughts on it now as me:



Confess ur sins ( I DNT KNOW WHICH SINS I COMMITTED DAT MADAME WANTS ME TO CONFESS O)



Hope to be a good child (AT LEAST SHE ADMITS SHE IS BAD, MSSCHEW)



Never do things that would get your partner angry (I GUESS DATS ME TALKING, LOL)



Try to fast, it helps ( YEAH RIGHT SO I BECOME LIKE IGBALE(BROOM),FOOLISH MADAME)



Meet new friends and people, it would help you a lot (NOW UR TALKING, MY BLOGSVILLE PEEPS ARE MY NEW FOUND FRIENDS)



Do not disintegrate(which kai oyibo i use sef) yourself from the outside world because your boyfriend says so ( UHM,TRUE TALK)



Be your own person ( OKAY)



Speak your mind (OKAY, GUESS DATS WHY I GOT MY OWN BLOG)



Satisfy yourself before you satisfy anyone ( AHH, DAT ONE GO HARD O)



Do not be contolled by anyone (MADAME, WHAT DO U MEAN)



If you help others, help them not because they are in need but because you want the mercy and favour of God (TRUE TALK)



Don't let anyone fuck with your head (YES BOSS)



Respect no body apart from God, ur family, ur husband, any other person, fuck them! (NA W OO, WHAT OF BOYFRIEND NOW)



They fuck you up,you fuck them up double (YESSS)



They hurt you,you kill them ( EASY MADAME, NO ONE WANTS TO GO TO JAIL)



They make you cry for 10mins, make them cry for a week, BUT , they make you cry for more than a day, make them cry for a lifetime (NAWA OOO)



They hate you, fuck them, they ain't the first to be hating (I SUPPORT THIS ONE)



U fall,get up fast before the enemies laugh at you ( 100% SUPPORT)



Nobody and i mean nobody is worth your tears (NA U SABI O MADAME)



Treat them as they come,with respect to who brings it, like shit to who is stupid.in fact fuck anyone who fucks with ya (THIS WAS THE FINAL ONE.)

Peace,

( i actually signed my name at the end)



I actually laughed when i saw it,i guess i had a big fight or misunderstanding with MR B wen i wrote this........na wa for me sef, i tire for MADAME.

SHE IS ERE, SHE MIGHT BE BAD BUT I JUST THINK THERE MIGHT BE A GOOD SIDE TO IT...........

OMG, i remember talking bou my other me and how she's bad and all,but something crazy happened 2night.Okay,let me start from the main gist,(I CHECK MR B.'S PHONE ALL THE TIME,AND THE PHONE IS ALWAYS LOCKED WITH A PASSWORD BUT I ALWAYS FIND MY WAY INTO THE PHONE.)

There is this babe who has been chatting with him or should i say he has been disturbing her but MR B is a player,a big time player (I KNOW, I SHOULDN'T BE WITH HIM BUT I LIKE BAD BOYS, I CAN'T HELP IT, I BELIVE THAT IF OTHER GIRLS CAN'T HANDLE THEM,I CAN DO IT AND TRUST ME I TAME THEM WELL ALTHOUGH I CAN'T CHANGE THEM,I BECOME THE NO1 BABE).

2 days ago,i saw on his phone him invting the babe to dinner and the girl sent a msg to cancel the dinner,my MR B. sent a message dat if he doesn't see her, he is not going to eat (SEE THIS GUY,DOING ROMEO AND JULIET). D babe replied she was going to come (FOOLISH GIRL), i saw that and to let peace reign i didn't talk, LET THEM NOT SAY GWYNNE HAS STARTED.

To cut the long story short,she called 2night while MR B. was sleeping and i picked (ABEG I WANTED TO HEAR HER VOICE SO I WOULD KNOW WHETHER TO CUT HER SHORT QUICKLY OR LET HER FOOL HERSELF A LITTLE BIT MORE BEFORE I INTERVENE), i picked and she said ''hello'' i replied ''hey who is this?''......... dts wen MR B. woke up and if u see d way he snatched the phone from my hand,i thought he was going to slap me o,see me see wahala,my guy switched off the phone sharply.

I had to ask who dat was (MIND YOU,THERE WAS A CALLER I.D AND MOREOVE I HAD HER FULL INFO, I SHOULD BE RECRUITED FOR THE CIA,WHEN I WANT INFO,I GET IT AND I DON'T CARE HOW I DO IT,I CAN PLAY DIRTY ATIMES), my guy said, ''she's a friend and why did u pick my phone?''.Me,i didn't answer o.i just turned and faced the other side. MR B. after dat didn't respect himself,he wanted to start touching me,normally i would let him touch and we would make love and forget bou it.

But the MADAME dat was chiling inside(MY OTHER ME) came out,i shouted at MR B. to leave me alone.i got up fom the bed and went into the bathroom,dats when MADAME showed me i can enjoy myself without having to wait for any man (ME DAT I WANTED TO STAY OFF SEX TILL I GET MARRIED BEFORE.OPPORTUNITY CAME FOR ME TO ACHIEVE IT)........................

I THINK MY OTHER PERSONALITY WANTS TO BE USHERED OUT,BUT SHE IS BADDD,REALLY BAD.........OMG!!!!!

Okay now am relaxed and better,God, its been hell 4 me.i had a fight with MR B, okay i know its not d first fight but i was just sick of the pattern.Dats another gist for another day.After d fight, i just got thinking how my life would have been if my other me was me instead of me now(u get).



Okay let me pull u thru,since i was little, have had this other me inside of me,but because of the kind of sociey we are in were u are supposed to be the good girl,the faithful one to ur boyfriend/husband,respect your parents,dont drink,dont smoke,go to church,get married,have kids and train your kids the same way too............but fuck that,the me everyone sees is the good girl,the faithful lover(AM A GUD GIRL,TOO GOOD ATIMES, HAVE BEEN TOLD),i am not a heavy drinker(GOT DRUNK TWICE THOUGH,ANOTHER GIST FOR ANOTHER DAY), i dont smoke,dont party(NOT OUT OF MY OWN FREE WILL THOUGH,SO NOW AM USED TO NOT GOING OUT), i dont do no wrong to people who know me.



But, there's another side nobody knew bou,not done anything bad though,but the other me wants to see what it feels like to go clubbing every friday,saturday night, roll with people,drink,see what it feels like to smoke.Live my life and not give a fuck bou wat people expect from me, do some crazy things like meet a guy,have a one night stand and not give a damn bou it.I want to see wat it feels like so when the time comes,i'ld say ''been there and done it all''.



But my mum would always say thank God for who u are,but the other me wants to get out and do some things u cant even begin to imagine.But sha sha sha(am not razz ooo,maybe i am, a little),let me appease my other me to chill out.I love my life right now(OR NOT).



Later people,got some work to do *wink* *wink*...................uhm, not what u r thinking oooooooooo.

I HATE HIM

I am not mentally sane to write right now,cos if i do,i'ld write things i dont want to write.
I WILL KILL SOMEONE,AM SICK AND TIRED OF LOVING...............

BORED TO DEATH HERE.................................AND SO MANY THINGS GOING THRU MY DIRTY MIND.......DAMN

Am tired of doing nufn,got this from chari,though i'ld fill in to.so.......WTF..........read on abeg....
Name:GWYNNE
Birthdate:LATE 80'S(DNT ASK ME THE YR)
Current Location: ACTUALLY NIGIY
Eye Color: BROWN
Hair Color:FOR NOW GREEN
Height:AM NOT TALL AND AM NOT SHORT(NO QUESTIONS)
Weight:F@#k, ALMOST 80,AM CHUBBY O
Piercings:JUST FOUR FOR NOW(USED TO HV TEN OF EM)
Overused Phraze:LOL, R U JOKING?(THE @ND ONE GETS PEOPLE ANGRY A LOT,AHAHAH)
Favourite Food:AM A JUNKIE BT OFADA RICE WITH THE STEW WOULD DO
Candy or Chocolates: CHOCOLATES(MOST DEF)
Colours:BLACK ALL THE WAY
Animal:DONT LIKE PETS(LOVE PUPPIES BT WEN THEY START TO GROW I HATE THEM
Drink:CHIEXOCTIC(PINEAPPLE AND COCONUT)
Alcohol Drink:NO WAY(THIS IS A LONG THING
Letter: M
Body Part on Opposite sex:AH(AGAIN LONG THING)
Pepsi or Coke: PEPSI
McDonalds or BurgerKing: MCDONALDS
Strawberry or Watermelon: WATERMELON
Hot tea or Ice tea:ICE TEA, DEF
Hot Chocolate or Coffee:COFFEE(WITH SUGAR AND CREAM)
Kiss or Hug:BOTH
Dog or Cat:I DONT LIKE ANY(NA BY FOCE)
Rap or Punk:RAP, JIGGA
Summer or Winter: WINTER( I KNW,I JUST LOVE IT COLD)
Scary Movies or Funny Movies:FUNNY MOVIE
Love or Money: THEY BOTH GOT TO COME WIT THE PACKAGE
Bedtime: I DNT SLEEPP AT NIGHT, GOT INSOMNIA, SERIOUS ONE
Most Missed Memory:BACK IN THE DAYS
Best phyiscal feature:MY SKIN
First Thought Waking Up: FOOD
Goal for this year: LIVE MY LIFE...............
Best Friends: DONT HAVE ANY.
Weakness: NOT TELLING
Fears: GOD, MY MOYTHER(IRON LADY)
Heritage: NIGERIA
Friends and Associates (All names have been changed)
MY B-MAN
CRAZY B